too familiar

Ow, right in the stuff:

>will always have to have a job or end up freezing on the streets in winter, fighting for a bunk at a shelter with Harry the Heroin Hobo
>you don’t wanna be homeless in my area
>will never get to be a NEET again, mother is fucking crazy and neither of us could abide my living there for long
>could spend all my waking hours on something cool like learning a bunch of shit
>instead have to keep it to one day a week due to work schedules
>only have a couple hours to myself on workdays, too tired to do much
>try anyway, post on 8ch between things for a break
>people ask me why I don’t have someone special in my life yet
>when I say I just wanna save up enough to pay my bills with enough time and money left over to do shit I like they look at me with this confused look or give a generic “cool” then silence
>then “so, did you watch that sports game?”
>I did not watch the sports game
>if I share shit I’m learning about, making, or reading in conversation it peters off awkwardly into silence before Bob and Susan start talking about how little Timmy threw his spinach mash at the wall for the 400th time, “ooooh how cuuute”
>I don’t find it interesting at all, kids are on a sliding scale from neutral-relatable to fucking annoying, loud shit factories
>only way to keep a convo going is to ask how their families are doing even if I don’t care too much, try to care for their sake since it makes them happy
>don’t get the same courtesy
>this will continue until I die

I just want a beast of a computer a la SEL, a fuckton of time to read all my books and maybe work on some DIY projects. If I could rout decent internet into the woods, I’d build a cabin away from them all and fucking do it. I know how to hunt and skin shit, build shelters, fire, and so on. As it is, too many of my interests are tied to tech. Think my feels are pretty mild compared to some other people.


Author: ma'habocath

ma'habocath knows some, tells much. ma'habocath knows few things others do. This one is a live-alone, full-time burger-flipper with an odd mind and too much to say. ma'hab always tries the best ma'hab can to keep up: • Chores • Bodybuilding and other health-nuttery • Japanese language studies • Culinary experimentation (see “other health-nuttery”) • Exploration of newfound spiritual territory • Exploration of my Self • Figuring out how to socialize well enough, mostly face-to-face • Backlogs: books, heavy metal, anime • Blogging, chatting, texting, and talking to whomever will listen about all of the above